People Who Quit Dating- Atlantic

Some people who want a relationship—badly—are deciding that the effort of searching for love isn’t worth it, Faith Hill writes. https://theatln.tc/Pnd5wYkO

Some people simply stop dating. “They still want a relationship—and they wouldn’t refuse if one unfolded naturally—but they’ve cycled between excitement and disappointment too many times to keep trying,” Hill writes. “Quitting dating means more than just deleting the apps, or no longer asking out acquaintances or friendly strangers. It means … [imagining] that they’ll never find the relationship they’ve always wanted. Facing that possibility can be painful. But it can also be helpful, allowing people to mourn the future they once expected—and redefine, on their own terms, what a fulfilling life could look like.”

“Drew Clement, a 37-year-old in Ohio who told me that his ‘entire approach to life changed’ when he quit dating,” Hill writes. “He used to attend concerts often, but he was always distracted by the possibility of romance—he’d make eye contact with someone in the crowd, then spend the rest of the show thinking about smiling their way or trying to get their number. But he doesn’t worry about that anymore. For the first time, he’s just watching the stage and listening to the music.”

Giving up dating altogether comes with risks. “What if you miss the date that would’ve changed everything?” Hill asks. “But with a laser focus on romance, you might pass up other possibilities.” The singles that Hill spoke to said they felt like they had more freedom, and more time to explore hobbies and focus on their careers.

“Marching on, after so many letdowns and embarrassments, is brave. But so is the decision to stop, a choice that American society too often doesn’t celebrate or even present as an option,” Hill continues. “Refusing to continue isn’t a cop-out so much as an affirmation of everything else precious that fills one’s days.”